alone 3rd july 2014

its the 3rd of july my mums birthday in 10 days. there are times I feel so alone lost then Andy comes home and I live again its like I'm waiting always waiting. I fill my life with with cats dogs birds and piggies. I love them all dearly. I hardly ever see my children they are grown and have busy lives like I once had. I'm not angry I understand why I dont see them I understand why my husband is missing he too has a busy life. I remember someone once said to me "your like a cork bobbing in the ocean going no where" its taken years for me to understand that. lonely floating along head stuck in yesterday, heart broken over things I cant change. not knowing how to change and when I try my body lets me down and the pain is unbearable but who do I tell ??? if I tell my kids there to busy to do anything, if I tell my husband he freaks out. there is no one I can really talk to, so I talk to myself the cats the dogs the birds and even the piggies. And I dream tomorrow will be better I'm lucky I'm loved.